Heading off to Burma tonight for a quick visa run. I don't want to give money to the Burmese govt. but am tight for time. I just checked into the overnight boat, which looks very basic. My bungalow is pretty posh and I think once I move on at the end of April, I'll need to adjust to spartan living. As long as I have my yoga mat, I should be fine. I purchased a djembe drum 12 inches and had lessons - whether I strap that to my pack is doubtful, but could lead to many fun opportunities.
I just received word from Tiffany that she and hubby do not need crew for Idonesia. We'll see what that means - I'll likely head to Nepal in May, Egypt in June and No. India for July and August. Then return to the US for Marta's wedding around 9/6? Who knows?
To continue on my daily routine from the last blog: after 2.5 hours of postures, we have breakfast. Then, we have lectures on the chakras and the associated practices and phsyiology. This varies widely. We have studied chanting, singing, voice training, visualization, coloring, painting, dancing, breathing in moving warrior poses very similar to thai chi, psychology/counseling, physiology, anatomy, energy work and the various circulatory and nerve systems as well as the cerebral hemisphere. We then have lunch at 1ish. This is almost always a salad of cabbage and carrots and tomatoes shredded like coleslaw w/out the mayo, rice and a veggie curry. We then go back to school for more of the same until we finish at 4. Sometimes I have a massage scheduled, I used to have drumming lessons, and sometimes I just hike (now ride) down to the beach to use the internet and get a fruit shake. Swimming is usually not too desirable given the shallow water and 6:00 dinner time. Dinner is similar to lunch w/the salad and rice. We have twice had black beans with a mexican theme - otherwise, fairly thai-based. On Monday, we have a movie at 7:30 like Zeitgeist, What the Bleep, etc. Thought provoking films. On Tuesday, we have a sangha - a circle where we discuss philosophy or the Bhagavad Gita from 7:30-9. On Thursday, we have chanting and singing in the sound dome from 7:30-9. On Friday, we have sound journeys, but I haven't taken one yet as I usually leave for the weekends. We usually have the weekend off with the option of attending a public welcome kirtan in the sound dome on Sunday night at 7:30. This is fun b/c other yogis from the other yoga centers on the island join us for song. This was one of my favorite parts of studying with Rusty and Janet in San Francisco. Here, it is a bit more Vedic, i.e. monotone, but still fun.
The other night, we listened to harmonics a capella toning. I fell asleep and when I woke up, I thought I was royalty and I wondered where my attendants were. It was only when I saw my clothes that I realized I was Kyra in Thailand at yoga training. It was bizarre. They say the throat chakra is the realm of tapping into the electromagnetic universe through vibrations and sound. They say the electromagnetic universe contains the akashic records/field of everything in the past, present and future, i.e. all the vibrations/energies/frequencies. Did I, then, tap into a past life as royalty???? Who knows?
The journey continues...
Bye for now!
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Flowing with the Chakras
There is an incredible book called 'The Book of Life' that discusses the religion and society of ancient Egypt. Believe it or not, their practices are very, very similar to yoga practiced in India and The Sciend of Yoga that we are studying at Pyramid Yoga Center here in Thailand. Take a look. It's fascinating. For instance, we've learned that humans usually use only 10% of their lung capacity. Due to pollution, processed foods, lack of exercise, stress and lack of breathing, we do not have enough oxygen in our systems to function properly, i.e. deficient immune systems, poor circulation, high stress, anxiety, insomnia, fatigue, grumpiness, etc. The list goes on and on. We started this program learning how to breathe. For days and days, it seems like that is all we did. It drove me bonkers. But now that we have learned various breathing techniques and expanded our lung capacity by doing various asanas (postures), I can feel the difference in my entire body. I am more vital and radiant than I have ever been. Of course, being without work and exercising 2.5 hours every day helps, but I can really feel a difference by the increased amount of oxygen in my body. They say that one of the biggest causes of disease is oxygen deficient cells. So is it possible that if we breathed more, we could cure some of those diseases without medicine? In Egypt, the first thing they did with sick people was to isolate them for three days to do various breathing exercises. They then had the people fast or do enemas to clear their systems. They then had them meditate to connect with a higher power and to clear their mind of the internal clutter. Only after all of this was done would they try to establish what else needed to be done. Oftentimes, the cure was already exacted through these techniques.
It's an interesting prospect. The power of oxygen. I welcome your comments...
Let me go ahead and describe a typical day. At 5:30 a.m., I wake up with the sunrise and the jungle wakes up with me. I sleep with my windows open and hope that the mosquito net will keep all unwanted guests out of my bed at least. Before rising, I say five things I am grateful for and do a couple of twists. Before popping out of bed, I check for scorpions on the floor - haven't seen any yet. I have a backdoor that leads to a bathroom without a ceiling. My mom and stepfather sent me a goofy pink wallhanging (cotton) that says "life is good" with a beatnick looking yogi smiling broadly - that's the first thing I see when I open the bathroom door and it always makes me smile. Thanks mom and Eric - you guys are funny every morning! I check for scorpions and snakes as I desend the three steps to my cold shower (no hot water here) which I take under the dawning sky. I may have "a spot of tea" before throwing on loose pants and a yoga shirt with a scarf. Sometimes I grab a handful of cashew nuts on my way out.
I walk up two hills and then a jungle path to get to the Pyramid. Sometimes I wear shoes, sometimes not. If it's raining, I may or may not take an umbrella. It doesn't really matter as it is relatively hot and steamy and we have water tubs outside of the studio and bathroom to clean our feet. The walk up both hills takes about 15 minutes. The Pyramid is open air with the largest mosquito net of blue ever seen. The 26 of us meditate there from 6:30 - 7:00 a.m. with the guidance of teachers David or Marina. As of yet, I haven't been able to stop the chatter of the mind. The jungle is teeming with noises from all the creatures and curiously there is a karaoke bar down the road that blasts thai music accompanied by bad singing during those morning hours. There is a lot to listen to, but my mind is the loudest of all. At one point, I had a haze where I didn't really hear anything, but I came out of the haze saying over and over: "In the work of One, there are no others." I take this to mean that while I am on this path of yoga, I ought not to get involved romantically or to pursue other activities as they will distract me from this inner journey. Thereafter, it's all good, even better in fact, b/c I'll know myself better and will certainly love myself much more. This program is good in every way possible. It's as if I left a charade and am in a grounded, nurturing place that encourages me to look at myself, feel myself, find where I exist as part of this world and STOP just to listen and feel and create. It gives me vitality, life, inspiration and answers a lot of questions that I hadn't bothered to consider before.
After mediation, we have asana practice from 7-9:30 a.m. It's incredible to do these practices in flow with our inhalations and exhalations. In San Francisco, I attended dynamic, fast classes that told us when to inhale and exhale, but it was all so fast that I often didn't breathe correctly in order to keep up. Thankfully, we took a LOT of time to learn the breathing, so I am finally doing the asanas as they are supposed to be felt - a flow of body and breath. It's incredible! At 9:30, we go down to the restaurant for breakfast. Every day I have a cup of tea and homemade mueslix of coconut and ground cashew nuts atop fresh papaya, pineapple, mango, banana and raisins with yogurt and coconut milk (sometimes I had palm sugar also). Yes mom, you'd be in heaven. I love breakfast here - it's the best mueslix I ever had. All made here, except for the yogurt and raisings.
Thereafter, it's back to the pyramid. We sit on pillows in either lotus, cross legged or knees bent underneath us. The point is to keep our backs straight for hours and hours in these positions. It was difficult initially, but it's getting easier. We stretch at times, too. We then discuss the chakras and their effects physiologically, psychologically and spiritually. The first, manipura, is the root chakra - it is materialism, survival instincts. Very rooted. The second is more fluid, represented by water and covalence - this represents our emotions, social instincts and reflections of other ideas - this is also the sexual attraction area. The third, swadhistana is the fire energy, like the sun. This is where we create and are active and strong. It destroys things to create new things. It is action! The fourth is the heart chakra. Love in and out. Emotions of where we've been and where we're going. it also the repulsion element in that we extend beyond ourselves to provide. It is somewhat connected to the intuition element which we'll get to in chakra 6 - ajna - third eye. Details to come. We're on the 4th right now.
During these hours, we also watch movies, learn sanskrit chants, songs and names of asanas. We are learning Egyptian dance, Yantra yoga (yogic numerology), diet and nutrition, voice training, Bhagvad Gita, Indian and Egyptian philosophy and tons more.
I rented a motorbike finally for the rest of my time on this island. It's nice to have one as the Internet and civilization are down a very steep mountain. Now I can ride my bike down and not have to climb back up.
I get homesick for my friends and family. We have a terrific community in SF. There is also a terrific community here. Tonight, I am going to dinner with an English lady named Vicky. I hope you are all well. I am very, very, very happy to be here. Life is short. I'm glad I'm living it like this now.
Kisses and hugs and love!!!
Kyra
It's an interesting prospect. The power of oxygen. I welcome your comments...
Let me go ahead and describe a typical day. At 5:30 a.m., I wake up with the sunrise and the jungle wakes up with me. I sleep with my windows open and hope that the mosquito net will keep all unwanted guests out of my bed at least. Before rising, I say five things I am grateful for and do a couple of twists. Before popping out of bed, I check for scorpions on the floor - haven't seen any yet. I have a backdoor that leads to a bathroom without a ceiling. My mom and stepfather sent me a goofy pink wallhanging (cotton) that says "life is good" with a beatnick looking yogi smiling broadly - that's the first thing I see when I open the bathroom door and it always makes me smile. Thanks mom and Eric - you guys are funny every morning! I check for scorpions and snakes as I desend the three steps to my cold shower (no hot water here) which I take under the dawning sky. I may have "a spot of tea" before throwing on loose pants and a yoga shirt with a scarf. Sometimes I grab a handful of cashew nuts on my way out.
I walk up two hills and then a jungle path to get to the Pyramid. Sometimes I wear shoes, sometimes not. If it's raining, I may or may not take an umbrella. It doesn't really matter as it is relatively hot and steamy and we have water tubs outside of the studio and bathroom to clean our feet. The walk up both hills takes about 15 minutes. The Pyramid is open air with the largest mosquito net of blue ever seen. The 26 of us meditate there from 6:30 - 7:00 a.m. with the guidance of teachers David or Marina. As of yet, I haven't been able to stop the chatter of the mind. The jungle is teeming with noises from all the creatures and curiously there is a karaoke bar down the road that blasts thai music accompanied by bad singing during those morning hours. There is a lot to listen to, but my mind is the loudest of all. At one point, I had a haze where I didn't really hear anything, but I came out of the haze saying over and over: "In the work of One, there are no others." I take this to mean that while I am on this path of yoga, I ought not to get involved romantically or to pursue other activities as they will distract me from this inner journey. Thereafter, it's all good, even better in fact, b/c I'll know myself better and will certainly love myself much more. This program is good in every way possible. It's as if I left a charade and am in a grounded, nurturing place that encourages me to look at myself, feel myself, find where I exist as part of this world and STOP just to listen and feel and create. It gives me vitality, life, inspiration and answers a lot of questions that I hadn't bothered to consider before.
After mediation, we have asana practice from 7-9:30 a.m. It's incredible to do these practices in flow with our inhalations and exhalations. In San Francisco, I attended dynamic, fast classes that told us when to inhale and exhale, but it was all so fast that I often didn't breathe correctly in order to keep up. Thankfully, we took a LOT of time to learn the breathing, so I am finally doing the asanas as they are supposed to be felt - a flow of body and breath. It's incredible! At 9:30, we go down to the restaurant for breakfast. Every day I have a cup of tea and homemade mueslix of coconut and ground cashew nuts atop fresh papaya, pineapple, mango, banana and raisins with yogurt and coconut milk (sometimes I had palm sugar also). Yes mom, you'd be in heaven. I love breakfast here - it's the best mueslix I ever had. All made here, except for the yogurt and raisings.
Thereafter, it's back to the pyramid. We sit on pillows in either lotus, cross legged or knees bent underneath us. The point is to keep our backs straight for hours and hours in these positions. It was difficult initially, but it's getting easier. We stretch at times, too. We then discuss the chakras and their effects physiologically, psychologically and spiritually. The first, manipura, is the root chakra - it is materialism, survival instincts. Very rooted. The second is more fluid, represented by water and covalence - this represents our emotions, social instincts and reflections of other ideas - this is also the sexual attraction area. The third, swadhistana is the fire energy, like the sun. This is where we create and are active and strong. It destroys things to create new things. It is action! The fourth is the heart chakra. Love in and out. Emotions of where we've been and where we're going. it also the repulsion element in that we extend beyond ourselves to provide. It is somewhat connected to the intuition element which we'll get to in chakra 6 - ajna - third eye. Details to come. We're on the 4th right now.
During these hours, we also watch movies, learn sanskrit chants, songs and names of asanas. We are learning Egyptian dance, Yantra yoga (yogic numerology), diet and nutrition, voice training, Bhagvad Gita, Indian and Egyptian philosophy and tons more.
I rented a motorbike finally for the rest of my time on this island. It's nice to have one as the Internet and civilization are down a very steep mountain. Now I can ride my bike down and not have to climb back up.
I get homesick for my friends and family. We have a terrific community in SF. There is also a terrific community here. Tonight, I am going to dinner with an English lady named Vicky. I hope you are all well. I am very, very, very happy to be here. Life is short. I'm glad I'm living it like this now.
Kisses and hugs and love!!!
Kyra
Saturday, March 8, 2008
It is finally sunny today. We have had days of torrential downpour followed by sweltering heat. The cicadas in the jungle are going crazy with their songs before and after the downpour and mosquitoes are everywhere. Fortunately, they don't seem to like me too much. For a while, there was just one living within my mosquito net. It reminded me of Rusty saying "If you don't think you can make a difference as just one person, think of a single mosquito." He was right. I have several cute little geckos in my cabin and I love to hear their songs.
I've travelled half the island on my motorbike or by boat. It is easeful and free to ride through the tropical jungle - even in the rain. I can't believe that five weeks have already passed. We have six more to go. This week, we finished the 4th Chakra. We're learning so much, that I can't really convey in words all there is: physiology, psychology, anatomy, science, vibrational energy frequencies, creative expression...the list goes on. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world to be here now.
The female yoga instructor has a boat that she sails around the world with her husband and child. We got along famously. They may need crew from July through Sept. to go from Australia to Indonesia. If so, there is my plan. I will keep my fingers crossed, but am also relishing the fact that I have no plan. Life is delicious right now.
I think of home often and wonder how you're all doing. I've been visited now by two buddies from SF and ran into another. The lovely flow of life that San Franciscans live fits nicely with this island. Like a second home for the community.
I'm as pleasant as punch right now. Learning a lot every day. Perhaps when it has all percolated, I can share details. For now, it is brewing...
I've travelled half the island on my motorbike or by boat. It is easeful and free to ride through the tropical jungle - even in the rain. I can't believe that five weeks have already passed. We have six more to go. This week, we finished the 4th Chakra. We're learning so much, that I can't really convey in words all there is: physiology, psychology, anatomy, science, vibrational energy frequencies, creative expression...the list goes on. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world to be here now.
The female yoga instructor has a boat that she sails around the world with her husband and child. We got along famously. They may need crew from July through Sept. to go from Australia to Indonesia. If so, there is my plan. I will keep my fingers crossed, but am also relishing the fact that I have no plan. Life is delicious right now.
I think of home often and wonder how you're all doing. I've been visited now by two buddies from SF and ran into another. The lovely flow of life that San Franciscans live fits nicely with this island. Like a second home for the community.
I'm as pleasant as punch right now. Learning a lot every day. Perhaps when it has all percolated, I can share details. For now, it is brewing...
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Just Breathe
| Today, I have a scooter and I've gone a solo journey to a beach on the north side of the island. It has a sandbar going out to a little island which I will traverse just after I write this blog. There, I will snorkel, sunbathe, read my homework in preparation for tomorrow's test, then drive my moped back to Pyramid for the 6:00 drum workshop, followed by singing at 7:30 in the sound dome. I just gave Marina a recording of all of the songs I learned from Rusty Wells and Janet Stone in San Francisco. I'm hopeful that she'll incorporate it into our Sunday night Kirtans. I sing the songs daily on my own, but they're so fun that I'd love to share them with everybody. In fact, I just led a call and response at a campfire the other night and it was incredible. That is another dream come true - singing around a campfire and having people sing back - and like my voice! Beautiful! I bombed my first exam. 64%. I was shocked. How could I score so low - it's just yoga? Then I realized that I had been skeptical of everything we were learning, didn't read the chapter and generally expected that I'd sail through it. In fact, there are deep levels of knowledge from physiological, psychological, energetic, historical and anatomical levels that I truly need to delve into to grasp the science of yoga they are teaching. This is hatha yoga - many aspects of it - there is much to learn. I'm no longer reading and writing every day - I have to get over my resistance to reading. I realized that I stopped reading anything serious a long time ago as I just plain read too much at work. I love people - I missed human interaction. Here, however, what I have to read is all about yoga, my own journey through this experiential process, and it is incredible to turn life completely inside out and upside down. Why not just dive in? No need for skepticims. The other day, I was watching a mandala morph in and out of shape to follow the vibrational currencies of energies and I laughed out loud b/c this is work! Ha! We are learning how to tap into the energy of sound, voice, visuals, movement, breathing, affirmations, dance, asanas - and it's soo new. I am coloring and dancing and singing and meditating. There are sweet places of peace that I've dropped into if only for a moment that are a silent stillness that I've never known. This is recovery for thinking too much - I'm in rehab! How to be a hippy? No. How to be a yogi tuning in with the frequencies of the electromagnetic frequencies of the universe and just let my hair down while learning all of the incredible benefits of yoga for health, creativity and imagination? Absolutely! |
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Pyramid Yoga
In the middle (slightly southwest, actually) of the Gulf of Thailand is an island called Koh Phangan. On Koh Phangan is a little beach called Haad Salad and directly up and up and up and up the hill is a jungle looking out over the west. In the middle of this jungle is a giant pyramid with a grass roof and hardwood floors surrounded by the largest bright blue mosquito net ever seen. Within that pyramid, I am learning the Science of Yoga. We are studying everything yoga related, i.e. chanting, singing, breathing, meditation, the chakras, electromagnetic energy and the law of physics, physiology, psychology, anatomy, spirituality, doing good deeds, studying yogic texts and of course doing the asanas (108 physical postures). There are people from all over the world and of all ages studying here (22 women and 3 men) for various reasons. All of them are special in their own right - unique - curious - well travelled - and sophisticated. I have a lovely little bungalow detached from the Pyramid property and am just beginning to get grounded now that we are in our second week.
There is much much much much much to say. I don't really know where to begin. I miss Rusty and Janet's classes very much. I was initially frustrated at the slow pace in which we did our asana practice. We spent the first two days learning how to breathe and doing an entire class learning only five very basic poses like tadasana (mountain pose). I cursed myself for not downloading Rusty's cd so that I could have a good ole' vinyasa class on my lovely balcony. I missed singing with Rusty and Janet and took to singing all the time around the property and silently when in class. I felt restless to get a motorbike and explore the island rather than read my books and write in my journal. During meditation, I would think five thousand thoughts and curse myself for not stopping. Then...it hit me...as we were doing asanas today, David (one of two teachers) said 'just let the flow of your breath move you in and out of the pose.' Although Rusty often said to move with the breath, I was often so busy keeping up with the incredible yogins around me that I forgot to breathe. Slowing down in yoga was actually the best thing I could've done for my practice. I did actually feel the breath. I can hear myself breathing now, as opposed to feeling like one day I'd catch up and breathe. Although their chants and songs are also slower than Rusty and Janet's, I am grateful for what has come to me and the ability to have voice training, yes! voice training, in order to sing these songs. I still sing their songs all the time and Marina (the other teacher) has asked me to sing on her dictaphone so they can broaden their repertoire. So there are Rusty and Janet's songs all the way over in Thailand! Today in mediation, I actually plunged into a ripple of calm and felt it's vibrations tickle around me like a feather - it was so calm. I've had people tell me very funny things about myself like: "I wish I was as flexible as you - you're forward bend looks so joyful!" and "you seem pretty cool," i.e. not pitha (but I am a pitha - which means fire energy in ayuverdic properties, I think) and "how are you so laid back, is that b/c you're from California?" One yoga teacher even pulled me up in front of class to show everybody what hyperextension looks like and how I automatically compensate, i.e. make adjustments to ensure that I don't hurt myself in postures - thank YOU Rusty and Janet for teaching me how to do this - I wasn't even aware that I was so flexible or hyperextended - I just learned from you how to do it correctly for me! My point is this: I'm pretty relaxed here. This yoga stuff is really helping. People see me as a way I've always wanted to feel and it's pretty mindblowing. My forward fold, i.e. forward journey IS indeed joyous! Here, we learn everything about yoga - not just exercise.
Although there are some challenges, too. We are starting with the first chakra and looking at the root principles. We've been charged with some challenging questions and I've seen very clearly that I have been living in a pattern that is fast, rapid, successful and very loving but busy. It's really nice to just relax and feel into my breath, feel into movement, feel into my emotions, feel into life, feel into nature and just feel into my connection with the universe on a physiological level. I never realized that electromagnetic physics could be so fascinating! Albert Einstein himself was a yogi. He said that imagination is more powerful than knowledge. If this is imagination and I have all the knowledge of a great education, an incredible community, a loving family and a wealth of travels and adventures, I can only imagine the possibilities as I feel into things, break down internal barriers and allow myself to creatively flow with my imagination. The first chakra is about survival as well as creativity. It is the building block for all. Mine has been too busy to truly explore this realm. Now is the time. I expect great, beautiful, super colorful things to come out of this. I am glad I am here.
I do miss you all - please write. BTW, I don't have my cell phone so no text messages to the old number. Just e-mail (on this blog or kmillich@hotmail.com). Much love to you, diving beings!
Kyra
There is much much much much much to say. I don't really know where to begin. I miss Rusty and Janet's classes very much. I was initially frustrated at the slow pace in which we did our asana practice. We spent the first two days learning how to breathe and doing an entire class learning only five very basic poses like tadasana (mountain pose). I cursed myself for not downloading Rusty's cd so that I could have a good ole' vinyasa class on my lovely balcony. I missed singing with Rusty and Janet and took to singing all the time around the property and silently when in class. I felt restless to get a motorbike and explore the island rather than read my books and write in my journal. During meditation, I would think five thousand thoughts and curse myself for not stopping. Then...it hit me...as we were doing asanas today, David (one of two teachers) said 'just let the flow of your breath move you in and out of the pose.' Although Rusty often said to move with the breath, I was often so busy keeping up with the incredible yogins around me that I forgot to breathe. Slowing down in yoga was actually the best thing I could've done for my practice. I did actually feel the breath. I can hear myself breathing now, as opposed to feeling like one day I'd catch up and breathe. Although their chants and songs are also slower than Rusty and Janet's, I am grateful for what has come to me and the ability to have voice training, yes! voice training, in order to sing these songs. I still sing their songs all the time and Marina (the other teacher) has asked me to sing on her dictaphone so they can broaden their repertoire. So there are Rusty and Janet's songs all the way over in Thailand! Today in mediation, I actually plunged into a ripple of calm and felt it's vibrations tickle around me like a feather - it was so calm. I've had people tell me very funny things about myself like: "I wish I was as flexible as you - you're forward bend looks so joyful!" and "you seem pretty cool," i.e. not pitha (but I am a pitha - which means fire energy in ayuverdic properties, I think) and "how are you so laid back, is that b/c you're from California?" One yoga teacher even pulled me up in front of class to show everybody what hyperextension looks like and how I automatically compensate, i.e. make adjustments to ensure that I don't hurt myself in postures - thank YOU Rusty and Janet for teaching me how to do this - I wasn't even aware that I was so flexible or hyperextended - I just learned from you how to do it correctly for me! My point is this: I'm pretty relaxed here. This yoga stuff is really helping. People see me as a way I've always wanted to feel and it's pretty mindblowing. My forward fold, i.e. forward journey IS indeed joyous! Here, we learn everything about yoga - not just exercise.
Although there are some challenges, too. We are starting with the first chakra and looking at the root principles. We've been charged with some challenging questions and I've seen very clearly that I have been living in a pattern that is fast, rapid, successful and very loving but busy. It's really nice to just relax and feel into my breath, feel into movement, feel into my emotions, feel into life, feel into nature and just feel into my connection with the universe on a physiological level. I never realized that electromagnetic physics could be so fascinating! Albert Einstein himself was a yogi. He said that imagination is more powerful than knowledge. If this is imagination and I have all the knowledge of a great education, an incredible community, a loving family and a wealth of travels and adventures, I can only imagine the possibilities as I feel into things, break down internal barriers and allow myself to creatively flow with my imagination. The first chakra is about survival as well as creativity. It is the building block for all. Mine has been too busy to truly explore this realm. Now is the time. I expect great, beautiful, super colorful things to come out of this. I am glad I am here.
I do miss you all - please write. BTW, I don't have my cell phone so no text messages to the old number. Just e-mail (on this blog or kmillich@hotmail.com). Much love to you, diving beings!
Kyra
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Sanctuary
There is a place on Koh Phangan called 'The Sanctuary.' I love it. The beach consists of light soft pebbles and sand and warm and wild waves dance from every direction to spill into a booming curl of wave after wave - a milder, gentler version of the Pacific - but no less enchanting for its sound or vitality. The people are open and relaxed from all over the world - they bring with them their cultures, their accents, their unique sense of style - yet they all seem to share this common mode of contentment. It is a community of Santosha only further enlivened by the quartz bolders radiating their energy into the bungalows and jungle gardens and towering palm trees billowing in the breeze. Many people have left their countries for a month or more, many have visited again and then again and then again only to reside here for six months and back at home for another six months to make money. I've met yoga teachers, a cartoon artist, a truffle maker, a tarot card reader, a filmmaker, a spa designer and so many others - all creative, all passionate about what they do, and all relaxing in and around this beautiful bay. It is nice to see that when people actually leave their lives' routines, that they do not have to live in squalor or out of a backpack - indeed, they can find communities that nurture and inspire, while the indiviuals maintain their unique personalities and in fact go deeper into themselves in this environment. I'm not exaggerating when I say that the people here have a glow - they are quite simply beautiful - contentment and following one's heart radiate from the inside out.
For instance, my neighbor at my first bungalow was so inspired that he sang opera first thing in the morning. While this is a lovely example of his openness and joy of life which I can appreciate, I chose to do so from afar. I moved. I also found it a bit odd that this particular garden bungalow overlooked an open air gym complete with perfectly polished weight machines. It's aptly called 'Jungle Gym.' A trip.
The next bungalow was just above the Sanctuary kitchen and lounge/restaurant area. A scientist named Bob was a returning traveller here, who like so many returning travelers to the Sanctuary, had been welcomed by the community and thrown a party on the eve of his departure. The music selection and the sound system are both fantastic and Bob quite liked dancing. I hope he will be safe as he returns to his violence-filled society in Kenya. The party went well into the morning and again, I appreciate the love, the lack of rules, the celebration of commnity and the incredible people here, but I chose to do so from afar. I moved further up the hill to lovely Bungalow 6. Imagine an outdoor shower with grantite spilling into the chamber on which you can shave your legs, place your things and get energized by all at once. Imagine further a little bungalow with a deck and hammock overlooking the crashing blue waves of the Gulf of Thailand and green jugles spilling over boulders onto the sand. This was my lovely little home for three more nights. It was perfect!
Just over the hill is a delicious restaurant with a breathtaking view. I was invited by a couple of people to attend a birthday dinner of one of the yoga instructors the third night that I was at Sanctuary. I went to the party and the couple who invited me (one man was from San Francisco and the woman says she recognizes me from San Francisco - she's an Aussie but his girlfriend for a while - both burners) were not there. Sprawled out on pillows among low tables piled with mounds of mouth-watering Thai food and coconuts were dozens of layed back 'local transplants.' I greeted the beautiful birthday girl, Lily, who is a yoga teacher as she was getting four massages - on each limb from adoring men - and beaming a bright beautiful smile onto the party. The moon shined behind her and the sound of the waves far below made it seem like we were all floating. I wished her a happy birthday and joined the party. Even though I knew nobody, every person was open and kind. Within moments Kate from England and I were sharing a lovely steamed fish that we ate with our fingers - succulent sweet and spicy, it was. Kate has returned many times to this place and spent a long time travelling - she is me in a couple of years. She is relaxed, smart and beautiful. She said 'I look forward to seeing you again after your course.' I couldn't agree more. On my other side was Marisa - a champion thai boxer from Australia (I think) - who decided there should be gyms on the island. She started 'Jungle Gym.' Who knew a foreigner could come up with such a wacky idea and apparently be quite successful? Wild.
The list goes on...the beauty of all of this, the realization that I'd left it all behind, the stark contrast between me and them as far as how completely laid back they were, the realization that every person at the table had chosen to change their lives in this manner....well, it was quite simply overwhelming. I kept feeling waves of emotion. I got up and walked to a giant boulder nearby and laid down to gaze at the stars and process my feelings. Shortly thereafter, I was joined by one of the men at the table - a wild blue eyed blonde with a gentle nature - named Shane. He silently joined me from a distance and after a few minutes we pointed out constellations to eachother and reveled in the beauty of the night sky. He then got up and rejoined the party. I did the same a few minutes later. The interactions here are that simple. Easy, natural and good.
The next day, as I was swinging on my hammock, I realized that much of my life has been trying to be someone that I am not - trying to force a round peg into a square hole. For instance, as a pre-teen, I played sports - not b/c I liked them - but b/c that's what my friends were doing and I didn't want to miss out. I tried to get into jingle writing and accepted jobs that were secretarial and media trafficking oriented for several years instead of really going for it. I then went to law school b/c I felt like I hadn't had enough respect in life and people didn't think I was smart enough. Where I got this idea is still a mystery. My head. We all know that for me, practicing litigation was always a struggle. It feels like a life long ago now - accounting for every six minutes of my time in order to bill properly; thinking and writing analytically although my thoughts are florid and my writing more romantic than persuasive; rarely interacting face to face with anyone who was happy with their lives, i.e. opposing counsel, other lawyers and clients who had been screwed by the system in one way or another. I was fortunate to be in a law firm with good people who were kind-hearted and were passionate about consumer protection via the law. But, it never quite fit. I am processing this now - it's a lot to take in...all around me are people that have chosen paths that DO fit. Now is my time to do the same. Trust. Love. Surrender.
I met a giant of a man with dark hair and a keen intellect - again - radiant. He has returned to Sanctuary many times to teach a course in yoga with his partner, a stunning woman who is as zen as it gets. Like him, there is something settled and stoic and beautiful about her. This man told me I should take their course at the Sanctuary for one month beginning Feb. 22. He said to give Pyramid a week and then come back if I didn't like it. He said his course is the true course to learn to teach yoga properly. The new age aspects of Pyramid - with the singing, the chanting, the chakra study, the mandala drawing, etc. - although appealing to me seem to him to be superfluous new age stuff that can contribute to a solid base. But, he says, his course is the solid base that I need. When I told him that I signed up as a result of a series of serendipitous events, he said 'maybe that all happened just to get you on the island. Be spontaneous.' I grappled with this. Was this man a message sent by the universe to put me on the right course or was this an amplification of my usual pattern in following someone else's lead and not thinking for myself?
I had my tarot cards read by an exotic happy Spaniard who wore shells and leather on his scantily adorned tanned and toned body. His name is Pau. He reminds me much of another radiant, exotic man named JaJa back in San Francisco. I liked Pau immediately. His eyes shine. As he read my cards I silently asked if I should go with this man or go on my own. After Pau confirmed that I had a question in my mind, he answered 'you know emotionally what you want, you know what you love - the answer is yes - but you first need to develop your creativity and strength and have fun - not just one person is your teacher or your guide - you have the knowledge already within you but you just can't see it. Take your time. Follow your path. Stay open.' I asked out loud if my teacher would come to me. Pau read the cards and answered that my teacher had already come, that my teacher was everywhere - in a bird, in a child, in the ocean, in eachother. He said I am just beginning to open to all of this. I asked if I would heal people. He pulled cards and said that yes, I have already healed and inspired may people - that I stem from a very powerful source, but that I got preoccupied and bogged down and distracted from my path. He asked 'you have really delved into healing yourself about six months ago?' And I responded 'yes.' At about that time, I told my boss and my community that I was quitting my job and doing this course. I said it to everyone to make that affirmation - so I couldn't change my mind. He then explained that the next card showed a woman with a master teacher standing alongside her. She is looking at the balls and holding one in her hand, not looking at the master. He asked what I saw in the card and I said 'she seems selfish and foolish, here is this wise person waiting for her attention to share his wisdom and she's too preoccupied to notice.' Pau responded, 'no, no, don't you see that she is caring about her own needs, tending to her own development before blindly offering up what she has to someone else. This woman is you, she is not selfish, she is cultivating herself, honing her tools. The master stays there. When she is ready, then she can share with him. He reiterated that I am on my path, that it is okay to be on it. There is nothing selfish about it, nothing to feel bad about. Stay open, stay open, stay open. He asked what I saw in the next card and I said a sad woman with an empty cup. He laughed and said to take a closer look: indeed the cup was running over. The woman was a queen, looking lovingly at the cup as it spilled over. He said this is you - you are a powerful woman. Your cup is running over with love and energy and healing. Yet you choose not to see it. This is why you have come here. To open your eyes, to accept your nature, to open. The last card he asked again what I saw - I saw a sorrow filled girl. He lauged again and said this was a thoughtful and conscious princess - she is spreading her seeds of enlightenment all around to so many people. She is directed by the Queen's (my) vitality. He said that this interplay is my future. To open, to be conscious and powerful and healing and loving. But my present, my present is cultivating the tools to open my heart and embrace my true self.
The last day at Sanctuary I got a two hour thai massage from a lady named Mae at Bamboo Hut. Her place was on top of the boulder where I'd star gazed previously. I laid down overlooking the ocean as she twisted and pried me every which way. It felt incredible. She told me I need once a week or a month to get all of the bad energy out of me. She said my yoga practice has moved it all around b/c it's no longer dormant in my body but needs to get out with yoga and massage. She also told me not to think so much. She said it's time now for me to rid myself of the energy that makes me stiff. To stay open...she told me I am beautiful, only growing more beautiful...stay open...
This theme rises up again an again. First, with the breathwork in Oct. 2006, then with a western astrology reading, then with revelations I had taking Rusty Well's yoga courses, then again with a Vedic Astrological reading from Bhagavan Das. I was meant to heal, I am powerful, I am on a course of opening and opening and in doing so, finding my true path. Although the opportunity to build a foundation to truly teach yoga exists today from another person, I trust that my path has lead me to Pyramid Yoga Center. This is what I want to do. I stay open to taking the foundation course at some other point - perhaps in Sept. My true teacher, my self, says that Pyramid right now is the way. I like trusting that. It feels good.
I arrived at Pyramid Yoga Center yesterday. The bungalow I settled into (after one swap) has a lovely view of the Gulf of Thailand and an outdoor shower with a little zen garden slightly detached and walled off from the bathroom. I take solace knowing that the scorpions prefer rocks to wood floors, so there's little chance they'll climb up to my bungalow. I take further solace knowing that the endemic cobras don't like the smell of humans so there's little chance they'll decide to reside alongside my bed. Nice little rhyme there. Otherwise no other scary creepy crawlies to be cocerned with.
As for the center, there is a giant pyramid of mosquito net walls and a sprawling hardwood floor. It is sooooo peaceful. Doing yoga here twice a day for three months is a blessing. I went into the sound dome that is filled with pillows, instruments and mandalas. I sang a bit to Ganesha and it sounded delightful. I think I'm really going to like it here. The people could not be better. I was concerned they'd be too young and too new agey - and indeed they have alternative professions, but again they are open and nice- not closed off and spacey. Two women are MS energy healers from Bermuda (although one is originally from Scotland so has the lovely brogue I love so much from my days at Stirling Univ.), one couple is from Cyprus (the Greek side) - he is a masseus. One lady came from South Africa with her two year old son - her hubby is staying for one month. There are several Canadians involved in the fitness world and looking to bring some Eastern philosophy into their practices. There is a young man from Ireland who has been roaming the world for three years and is trying to figure out what to do next. There's a man who is 39 (older than me - yahoo! I'm not the oldest!) who is a neuro sound healer. There are a couple of brits - one a funny journalist who reminds me of my old pal Jodi although no one can compare of course. All in all, there are lots of exchanges of interesting energy work to be done. The people I've met are true to their course and very grounded in their alterative professions. Again, this is an example of a community of people who have followed their hearts in their life's work.
As I write this today, I am very grateful for this ongoing lesson and opening and exposure and journeying. At times, I just can't believe it. I hear a voice in my head saying "This can't be real, this isn't for you," and then I simply notice that voice pass by as I take in what is around me always remaining open and open and open and open...
The course begins tomorrow. The journey continues...
For instance, my neighbor at my first bungalow was so inspired that he sang opera first thing in the morning. While this is a lovely example of his openness and joy of life which I can appreciate, I chose to do so from afar. I moved. I also found it a bit odd that this particular garden bungalow overlooked an open air gym complete with perfectly polished weight machines. It's aptly called 'Jungle Gym.' A trip.
The next bungalow was just above the Sanctuary kitchen and lounge/restaurant area. A scientist named Bob was a returning traveller here, who like so many returning travelers to the Sanctuary, had been welcomed by the community and thrown a party on the eve of his departure. The music selection and the sound system are both fantastic and Bob quite liked dancing. I hope he will be safe as he returns to his violence-filled society in Kenya. The party went well into the morning and again, I appreciate the love, the lack of rules, the celebration of commnity and the incredible people here, but I chose to do so from afar. I moved further up the hill to lovely Bungalow 6. Imagine an outdoor shower with grantite spilling into the chamber on which you can shave your legs, place your things and get energized by all at once. Imagine further a little bungalow with a deck and hammock overlooking the crashing blue waves of the Gulf of Thailand and green jugles spilling over boulders onto the sand. This was my lovely little home for three more nights. It was perfect!
Just over the hill is a delicious restaurant with a breathtaking view. I was invited by a couple of people to attend a birthday dinner of one of the yoga instructors the third night that I was at Sanctuary. I went to the party and the couple who invited me (one man was from San Francisco and the woman says she recognizes me from San Francisco - she's an Aussie but his girlfriend for a while - both burners) were not there. Sprawled out on pillows among low tables piled with mounds of mouth-watering Thai food and coconuts were dozens of layed back 'local transplants.' I greeted the beautiful birthday girl, Lily, who is a yoga teacher as she was getting four massages - on each limb from adoring men - and beaming a bright beautiful smile onto the party. The moon shined behind her and the sound of the waves far below made it seem like we were all floating. I wished her a happy birthday and joined the party. Even though I knew nobody, every person was open and kind. Within moments Kate from England and I were sharing a lovely steamed fish that we ate with our fingers - succulent sweet and spicy, it was. Kate has returned many times to this place and spent a long time travelling - she is me in a couple of years. She is relaxed, smart and beautiful. She said 'I look forward to seeing you again after your course.' I couldn't agree more. On my other side was Marisa - a champion thai boxer from Australia (I think) - who decided there should be gyms on the island. She started 'Jungle Gym.' Who knew a foreigner could come up with such a wacky idea and apparently be quite successful? Wild.
The list goes on...the beauty of all of this, the realization that I'd left it all behind, the stark contrast between me and them as far as how completely laid back they were, the realization that every person at the table had chosen to change their lives in this manner....well, it was quite simply overwhelming. I kept feeling waves of emotion. I got up and walked to a giant boulder nearby and laid down to gaze at the stars and process my feelings. Shortly thereafter, I was joined by one of the men at the table - a wild blue eyed blonde with a gentle nature - named Shane. He silently joined me from a distance and after a few minutes we pointed out constellations to eachother and reveled in the beauty of the night sky. He then got up and rejoined the party. I did the same a few minutes later. The interactions here are that simple. Easy, natural and good.
The next day, as I was swinging on my hammock, I realized that much of my life has been trying to be someone that I am not - trying to force a round peg into a square hole. For instance, as a pre-teen, I played sports - not b/c I liked them - but b/c that's what my friends were doing and I didn't want to miss out. I tried to get into jingle writing and accepted jobs that were secretarial and media trafficking oriented for several years instead of really going for it. I then went to law school b/c I felt like I hadn't had enough respect in life and people didn't think I was smart enough. Where I got this idea is still a mystery. My head. We all know that for me, practicing litigation was always a struggle. It feels like a life long ago now - accounting for every six minutes of my time in order to bill properly; thinking and writing analytically although my thoughts are florid and my writing more romantic than persuasive; rarely interacting face to face with anyone who was happy with their lives, i.e. opposing counsel, other lawyers and clients who had been screwed by the system in one way or another. I was fortunate to be in a law firm with good people who were kind-hearted and were passionate about consumer protection via the law. But, it never quite fit. I am processing this now - it's a lot to take in...all around me are people that have chosen paths that DO fit. Now is my time to do the same. Trust. Love. Surrender.
I met a giant of a man with dark hair and a keen intellect - again - radiant. He has returned to Sanctuary many times to teach a course in yoga with his partner, a stunning woman who is as zen as it gets. Like him, there is something settled and stoic and beautiful about her. This man told me I should take their course at the Sanctuary for one month beginning Feb. 22. He said to give Pyramid a week and then come back if I didn't like it. He said his course is the true course to learn to teach yoga properly. The new age aspects of Pyramid - with the singing, the chanting, the chakra study, the mandala drawing, etc. - although appealing to me seem to him to be superfluous new age stuff that can contribute to a solid base. But, he says, his course is the solid base that I need. When I told him that I signed up as a result of a series of serendipitous events, he said 'maybe that all happened just to get you on the island. Be spontaneous.' I grappled with this. Was this man a message sent by the universe to put me on the right course or was this an amplification of my usual pattern in following someone else's lead and not thinking for myself?
I had my tarot cards read by an exotic happy Spaniard who wore shells and leather on his scantily adorned tanned and toned body. His name is Pau. He reminds me much of another radiant, exotic man named JaJa back in San Francisco. I liked Pau immediately. His eyes shine. As he read my cards I silently asked if I should go with this man or go on my own. After Pau confirmed that I had a question in my mind, he answered 'you know emotionally what you want, you know what you love - the answer is yes - but you first need to develop your creativity and strength and have fun - not just one person is your teacher or your guide - you have the knowledge already within you but you just can't see it. Take your time. Follow your path. Stay open.' I asked out loud if my teacher would come to me. Pau read the cards and answered that my teacher had already come, that my teacher was everywhere - in a bird, in a child, in the ocean, in eachother. He said I am just beginning to open to all of this. I asked if I would heal people. He pulled cards and said that yes, I have already healed and inspired may people - that I stem from a very powerful source, but that I got preoccupied and bogged down and distracted from my path. He asked 'you have really delved into healing yourself about six months ago?' And I responded 'yes.' At about that time, I told my boss and my community that I was quitting my job and doing this course. I said it to everyone to make that affirmation - so I couldn't change my mind. He then explained that the next card showed a woman with a master teacher standing alongside her. She is looking at the balls and holding one in her hand, not looking at the master. He asked what I saw in the card and I said 'she seems selfish and foolish, here is this wise person waiting for her attention to share his wisdom and she's too preoccupied to notice.' Pau responded, 'no, no, don't you see that she is caring about her own needs, tending to her own development before blindly offering up what she has to someone else. This woman is you, she is not selfish, she is cultivating herself, honing her tools. The master stays there. When she is ready, then she can share with him. He reiterated that I am on my path, that it is okay to be on it. There is nothing selfish about it, nothing to feel bad about. Stay open, stay open, stay open. He asked what I saw in the next card and I said a sad woman with an empty cup. He laughed and said to take a closer look: indeed the cup was running over. The woman was a queen, looking lovingly at the cup as it spilled over. He said this is you - you are a powerful woman. Your cup is running over with love and energy and healing. Yet you choose not to see it. This is why you have come here. To open your eyes, to accept your nature, to open. The last card he asked again what I saw - I saw a sorrow filled girl. He lauged again and said this was a thoughtful and conscious princess - she is spreading her seeds of enlightenment all around to so many people. She is directed by the Queen's (my) vitality. He said that this interplay is my future. To open, to be conscious and powerful and healing and loving. But my present, my present is cultivating the tools to open my heart and embrace my true self.
The last day at Sanctuary I got a two hour thai massage from a lady named Mae at Bamboo Hut. Her place was on top of the boulder where I'd star gazed previously. I laid down overlooking the ocean as she twisted and pried me every which way. It felt incredible. She told me I need once a week or a month to get all of the bad energy out of me. She said my yoga practice has moved it all around b/c it's no longer dormant in my body but needs to get out with yoga and massage. She also told me not to think so much. She said it's time now for me to rid myself of the energy that makes me stiff. To stay open...she told me I am beautiful, only growing more beautiful...stay open...
This theme rises up again an again. First, with the breathwork in Oct. 2006, then with a western astrology reading, then with revelations I had taking Rusty Well's yoga courses, then again with a Vedic Astrological reading from Bhagavan Das. I was meant to heal, I am powerful, I am on a course of opening and opening and in doing so, finding my true path. Although the opportunity to build a foundation to truly teach yoga exists today from another person, I trust that my path has lead me to Pyramid Yoga Center. This is what I want to do. I stay open to taking the foundation course at some other point - perhaps in Sept. My true teacher, my self, says that Pyramid right now is the way. I like trusting that. It feels good.
I arrived at Pyramid Yoga Center yesterday. The bungalow I settled into (after one swap) has a lovely view of the Gulf of Thailand and an outdoor shower with a little zen garden slightly detached and walled off from the bathroom. I take solace knowing that the scorpions prefer rocks to wood floors, so there's little chance they'll climb up to my bungalow. I take further solace knowing that the endemic cobras don't like the smell of humans so there's little chance they'll decide to reside alongside my bed. Nice little rhyme there. Otherwise no other scary creepy crawlies to be cocerned with.
As for the center, there is a giant pyramid of mosquito net walls and a sprawling hardwood floor. It is sooooo peaceful. Doing yoga here twice a day for three months is a blessing. I went into the sound dome that is filled with pillows, instruments and mandalas. I sang a bit to Ganesha and it sounded delightful. I think I'm really going to like it here. The people could not be better. I was concerned they'd be too young and too new agey - and indeed they have alternative professions, but again they are open and nice- not closed off and spacey. Two women are MS energy healers from Bermuda (although one is originally from Scotland so has the lovely brogue I love so much from my days at Stirling Univ.), one couple is from Cyprus (the Greek side) - he is a masseus. One lady came from South Africa with her two year old son - her hubby is staying for one month. There are several Canadians involved in the fitness world and looking to bring some Eastern philosophy into their practices. There is a young man from Ireland who has been roaming the world for three years and is trying to figure out what to do next. There's a man who is 39 (older than me - yahoo! I'm not the oldest!) who is a neuro sound healer. There are a couple of brits - one a funny journalist who reminds me of my old pal Jodi although no one can compare of course. All in all, there are lots of exchanges of interesting energy work to be done. The people I've met are true to their course and very grounded in their alterative professions. Again, this is an example of a community of people who have followed their hearts in their life's work.
As I write this today, I am very grateful for this ongoing lesson and opening and exposure and journeying. At times, I just can't believe it. I hear a voice in my head saying "This can't be real, this isn't for you," and then I simply notice that voice pass by as I take in what is around me always remaining open and open and open and open...
The course begins tomorrow. The journey continues...
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Bay to Bangkok
Getting out of San Francisco airport was tougher than I imagined. I was marked for a security check and waited several times in marked off quarters to go through security. After having a nitrogen scan in the air chamber, I was ushered into a big plastic box and "observed" by a TSA officer for about four minutes as other travelers rushed past and gathered their things from the conveyer belt. I started fretting that I looked suspicious and worried that they'd keep me longer. It reminded me that had I accepted the NGO job with a risk of imprisonment in Thailand, my captivity and sense of paranoia would be far, far worse. After scouring my bags and asking me a series of inconsequential questions, they let me pass through. It was as if America was saying "wait a minute, you DARE to leave this American life of yours, there MUST be something dangerous about you. Perhaps there is --curiosity and absolute freedom (once they let me go, of course). In LA, I met a woman in the waiting gate who told me I could upgrade to premium economy for $100 and lay down all the way. I asked at the gate and they said it was too late and the flight was full. Later, while everyone was sleeping, I crept into an unused seat ad slept blissfully. Later, the stewards noticed that they had one hot wet towel too few and quickly isolated me as the perpetrator. I returned to my seat only to be met by a lady in a business suit who told me I'd have to pay $750 USD for the upgrade and walked away. After a few moments, I followed her to the back and requested that I pay only $100 for the seat due to my understanding of the price difference. She was clearly offended that I hadn't asked her permission to upgrade. I apologized and said I didn't mean to offend anybody. Once I apologized, she looked far less distressed and said it was okay. We then smiled and wai'd eachother (hands together at heart with a slight bow). This was a reminder to stick to the rules and shirk my cowboy attitude. It wasn't about money to her, it was the discourtesy that was worse. Welcome to Asia! Wake up and respect, Kyra!
Today is my third and final day in Bangkok. My friend Ben has been living here for four years and has a huge lovely four-bedroom home on the Eastern side of Bangkok. The house is beautiful and my room has lots of windows from which I can hear the many crickets and birds of pseudo-suburban Thailand. He's the only foreigner living around here so I'm completely immersed in Thai culture. We eat food from the roadside stalls in a sprawling market close by or take a tuk tuk to the river to have meals along the river. The food is incredible here - very spicy, very flavorful, very fresh, very cheap. My first day was spent roaming around the Royal Palace and the historic district in a haze of jet lag while Ben was at work and meeting up with another friend for a few hours, then falling asleep by 9pm. I awoke at 3 am the next morning and later heard the song of my favorite woo woo woo woo bird (a myna bird?) and smiled ear to ear. A gecko scurried across the wall and I was comforted by the little critter knowing he'd eat mosquitoes if there were any.
Last night was truly an experience. We met up with some of Ben's friend and spent the day by the river going to temples, shopping, eating, drinking thai beer and watching the boat traffic go by with monks in saffron robes, school children and everyone else aboard all sorts of boats that did not appear to have any nautical traffic rules whatsoever - just like on the streets. There are so many close calls here, but I haven't see an accident yet. Amazing. It was only when I was noticing five boats converging on one spot from different directions that it hit me: I'm here! I relaxed in with the insane flow of things and listened while Ben and his buddies talked about the difficulties of teaching in Bangkok to kids who don't speak English - apparently you can just come here and teach whatever subject you want to kids who attend English only speaking schools - and complained about the expat subculture and admonitions from local people that they received if they failed to wear the state-designated daily colors. It recently went from yellow to pink on Tuesdays. Who knew? What color would good ole' Bush choose for Tuesdays, I wonder. Yella? They all love living in Bangkok and have learned the language pretty well. If I choose to work, it will be no problem to return here. That's nice to know, although doubtful - if I was to go to a city, I'd prefer Kuala Lumpur, I think.
Bangkok is cleaner and more modern than I recall from my visit 10 years ago. I returned to Khao San Road and wandered among 20 something backpackers looking haggard and rugged from their travels. While this type of travel resonated with me at age 23, it is no longer the type of travel I'd like to do. I am indeed, confessing as a high-maintenance traveler that I prefer a more refined manner of searching through SE Asia. I will forge my own path of medium budget healthy accommodations with spirituality wherever possible. Grunge is not my cup of tea. I have a feeling I'll settle for longer periods of time in various places and immerse myself comfortably in the culture. We'll see.
Yesterday evening was truly a marvel! Ben and one of his thai girlfriends went to a local Thai club that looked like a ride at Disneyland or a theme room in Vegas. It had tropical trees and vines all over with white lights strung everywhere and wooden walls with waterfalls. A great long-haired band came on to the delight of squealing Thai women who danced more and more around their tables as the night continued and the alcohol consumption continued. Their smiles were penetrable. We were sitting front and center as the only foreigner/fareng. I was the only female farang and the men in the band kept winking at me and blowing me kisses while singing, especially when they covered "Still loving you" by the Scorpions in English. There was a guy standing on his table very close to us with wild long hair, a cowboy hat, feather chaps and a belt with red and blue flashing lights and a Scorpions t-shirt who struck poses all night long like John Travolta in 'staying alive.' I wonder if he goes to Burning Man??? It was all very fun. Thereafter, we headed to a place that could only exist in Thailand. It was a smoky, multi-level nightclub with a giant stage in the Bangkok ghetto filled with Cambodians and Laotians. On stage were beautiful dancers in flashy sequined and boa outfits doing synchronized dancing to upbeat music - almost all men/many transvestites were spinning around and sashaying to and fro as stunning women. The really crazy thing was that almost every man in the joint had 1980s hairstyles, i.e. fancy mullets with spiky hair (remember flock of seagulls) and spanking clean white suits with glitter on some and fancy cravates on others. They also danced and sang in a synchronized form and well, they were just so flaming gay as they taunted each other on stage that I thought the place would go up in smoke. The audience was wild - again dancing around their tables - as the singers would collect rope necklaces of 100 Baht notes around their neck from adoring fans. I was again the only farang female and it felt oddly familiar to feel safe and inspired by gay men everywhere. If this act was to go to San Francisco, the men would love it! When I left, one of the performers shook my hand in the western fashion and smiled while saying in a super high pitched gay tone something like "you really should try my hair product for that frizz of yours" I'm guessing. All I could do was laugh at the novelty of it all as we jumped in a cab to yet another dance club that had western 20-somethings and was by comparison, uninspired.
This morning, I awoke to the old smell of smoke-filled hair. Ugh! Bangkok's attempted ban on smoking in clubs is apparently not working. Fortunately, there is a hot water shower only steps away. It is doubtful that my interim abode in Koh Phangan island (I move into the program accomodation on 2/2) will have hot water, so I will savor this luxury before stepping out to an even greater one: the street full of tuk tuks and motorbikes, buses and exhaust fumes, hawkers selling food of every imaginable scent, smell and description, schoolgirls and monks and Thai folk haggling and zooming around everywhere in every direction all at once...yet never running into each other or complaining about loud crazy music blaring in their ears or near misses by vehicles...then, for no reason at all, I am behind a mild man carrying a small speaker who sings gentle thai songs while walking slowly through the crowds and small snakes writhe in plastic tubs as turtles try to climb out of another and in the distance you can hear the monks chanting in the temple and people clanging bells for luck at the nearby wat as fish writhe all over each other in the nearby river as people feed them 'lucky bread' and make wishes to the fish...oh right, and if I do get in a cab, I have to trust that it's all in the flow when the driver takes both hands off the wheel to wai every time we pass a temple or a picture of the king (all the time) while cars and motos merge in and out of lanes like a lovely meandering dance - exactly as it should be. This place is a trip. A trip indeed. It's nice to be here. This afternoon...the islands...
Today is my third and final day in Bangkok. My friend Ben has been living here for four years and has a huge lovely four-bedroom home on the Eastern side of Bangkok. The house is beautiful and my room has lots of windows from which I can hear the many crickets and birds of pseudo-suburban Thailand. He's the only foreigner living around here so I'm completely immersed in Thai culture. We eat food from the roadside stalls in a sprawling market close by or take a tuk tuk to the river to have meals along the river. The food is incredible here - very spicy, very flavorful, very fresh, very cheap. My first day was spent roaming around the Royal Palace and the historic district in a haze of jet lag while Ben was at work and meeting up with another friend for a few hours, then falling asleep by 9pm. I awoke at 3 am the next morning and later heard the song of my favorite woo woo woo woo bird (a myna bird?) and smiled ear to ear. A gecko scurried across the wall and I was comforted by the little critter knowing he'd eat mosquitoes if there were any.
Last night was truly an experience. We met up with some of Ben's friend and spent the day by the river going to temples, shopping, eating, drinking thai beer and watching the boat traffic go by with monks in saffron robes, school children and everyone else aboard all sorts of boats that did not appear to have any nautical traffic rules whatsoever - just like on the streets. There are so many close calls here, but I haven't see an accident yet. Amazing. It was only when I was noticing five boats converging on one spot from different directions that it hit me: I'm here! I relaxed in with the insane flow of things and listened while Ben and his buddies talked about the difficulties of teaching in Bangkok to kids who don't speak English - apparently you can just come here and teach whatever subject you want to kids who attend English only speaking schools - and complained about the expat subculture and admonitions from local people that they received if they failed to wear the state-designated daily colors. It recently went from yellow to pink on Tuesdays. Who knew? What color would good ole' Bush choose for Tuesdays, I wonder. Yella? They all love living in Bangkok and have learned the language pretty well. If I choose to work, it will be no problem to return here. That's nice to know, although doubtful - if I was to go to a city, I'd prefer Kuala Lumpur, I think.
Bangkok is cleaner and more modern than I recall from my visit 10 years ago. I returned to Khao San Road and wandered among 20 something backpackers looking haggard and rugged from their travels. While this type of travel resonated with me at age 23, it is no longer the type of travel I'd like to do. I am indeed, confessing as a high-maintenance traveler that I prefer a more refined manner of searching through SE Asia. I will forge my own path of medium budget healthy accommodations with spirituality wherever possible. Grunge is not my cup of tea. I have a feeling I'll settle for longer periods of time in various places and immerse myself comfortably in the culture. We'll see.
Yesterday evening was truly a marvel! Ben and one of his thai girlfriends went to a local Thai club that looked like a ride at Disneyland or a theme room in Vegas. It had tropical trees and vines all over with white lights strung everywhere and wooden walls with waterfalls. A great long-haired band came on to the delight of squealing Thai women who danced more and more around their tables as the night continued and the alcohol consumption continued. Their smiles were penetrable. We were sitting front and center as the only foreigner/fareng. I was the only female farang and the men in the band kept winking at me and blowing me kisses while singing, especially when they covered "Still loving you" by the Scorpions in English. There was a guy standing on his table very close to us with wild long hair, a cowboy hat, feather chaps and a belt with red and blue flashing lights and a Scorpions t-shirt who struck poses all night long like John Travolta in 'staying alive.' I wonder if he goes to Burning Man??? It was all very fun. Thereafter, we headed to a place that could only exist in Thailand. It was a smoky, multi-level nightclub with a giant stage in the Bangkok ghetto filled with Cambodians and Laotians. On stage were beautiful dancers in flashy sequined and boa outfits doing synchronized dancing to upbeat music - almost all men/many transvestites were spinning around and sashaying to and fro as stunning women. The really crazy thing was that almost every man in the joint had 1980s hairstyles, i.e. fancy mullets with spiky hair (remember flock of seagulls) and spanking clean white suits with glitter on some and fancy cravates on others. They also danced and sang in a synchronized form and well, they were just so flaming gay as they taunted each other on stage that I thought the place would go up in smoke. The audience was wild - again dancing around their tables - as the singers would collect rope necklaces of 100 Baht notes around their neck from adoring fans. I was again the only farang female and it felt oddly familiar to feel safe and inspired by gay men everywhere. If this act was to go to San Francisco, the men would love it! When I left, one of the performers shook my hand in the western fashion and smiled while saying in a super high pitched gay tone something like "you really should try my hair product for that frizz of yours" I'm guessing. All I could do was laugh at the novelty of it all as we jumped in a cab to yet another dance club that had western 20-somethings and was by comparison, uninspired.
This morning, I awoke to the old smell of smoke-filled hair. Ugh! Bangkok's attempted ban on smoking in clubs is apparently not working. Fortunately, there is a hot water shower only steps away. It is doubtful that my interim abode in Koh Phangan island (I move into the program accomodation on 2/2) will have hot water, so I will savor this luxury before stepping out to an even greater one: the street full of tuk tuks and motorbikes, buses and exhaust fumes, hawkers selling food of every imaginable scent, smell and description, schoolgirls and monks and Thai folk haggling and zooming around everywhere in every direction all at once...yet never running into each other or complaining about loud crazy music blaring in their ears or near misses by vehicles...then, for no reason at all, I am behind a mild man carrying a small speaker who sings gentle thai songs while walking slowly through the crowds and small snakes writhe in plastic tubs as turtles try to climb out of another and in the distance you can hear the monks chanting in the temple and people clanging bells for luck at the nearby wat as fish writhe all over each other in the nearby river as people feed them 'lucky bread' and make wishes to the fish...oh right, and if I do get in a cab, I have to trust that it's all in the flow when the driver takes both hands off the wheel to wai every time we pass a temple or a picture of the king (all the time) while cars and motos merge in and out of lanes like a lovely meandering dance - exactly as it should be. This place is a trip. A trip indeed. It's nice to be here. This afternoon...the islands...
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