Goa Yoga

Here I am in Goa, India. I'm studying yoga at Riva Resort on Mandrem Beach. I'm staying at www.dandoholidayhuts.com with friends from Leh between Mandrem and Arambol Beaches. They are turning this resort into a meditation retreat center and gave me a free place to stay in exchange for teaching yoga and meditation. The flyer for the place even has my picture on it as I am raising my arms to the sun up in Leh.

My hut is idyllic - made of grass with two windows overlooking a placid lake and palm tree groves with the sound of the waves crashing only five minutes away. I walk to school every morning at 6 a.m. I walk along a river, through a palm tree grove, past a small gathering of Indian homes with a family of pigs roaming about, then along the river again until it comes to the ocean. Then I walk along the beach until I get to my open air school.

In school, we are learning Ashtanga Yoga through the Iyengar and Himalaya methods. We also are learning chants, pranayama, meditation, anatomy, ayurveda and various philosophies. The two main teachers are indian and have studied with masters since a young age. Their age is impossible to tell - they appear very youthful. It's a tough discipline as we are doing four hours of physically demanding ashtanga yoga a day. We have finished one week.

The first day, I cursed myself and said "this is really hard - why am I here?" But I see that the reason I am here is to slow down, get back within my body, tone up my muscles and relax into all that is India and all that is yoga. I'm still travelling, but I've been whirling about for so long that I've lost my center and my practice. It's really nice, though challenging, to come back to these via mediation, breathing and yoga. This course is professional and slow - nothing is easy - but it's all very deep and I am already experiencing lessons and emotions that I will reflect upon in a later blog as I am still processing. Mainly, I feel alone and I know that I can not go back to a corporate life. I don't know what to do and feel a bit lost. At the same time, I feel I'm easing into the true essence of me that makes me feel really good. If I continue this practice, when I make a choice, it will serve my highest interest and I can be healthy and happy.

The resort I stayed at in Egypt contacted me to potentially start a yoga program . We have talked and I will know more later in December. If it's a go, I may return to Egypt in January and work for three months and study arabic and teach english, then perhaps explore the middle east. It is so fascinating to me. Not to mention, the economy is not so good to find a job now - teaching english and yoga is always a possibility. Life is nice. I just wish I had a man whom I could share all this love with.

As soon as I returned to India, I was relieved to see cows on the road. Two girls in the car with me were freaking out about EVERYHING and I remained unfazed. Welcome home to crazy beautiful India. I eventually found my friends' place and only one of them was here, buried underneath remodeling projects. The place itself is gorgeous and there is much work to do before it is officially open in two weeks. Last night, my other friend arrived and I feel like I am again with my Leh "family." We've adopted a kitten and have the landlord's dog, so we even have pets!

The people in my course are very nice - 20 women plus one man - and no one bothers me. They are from all over the world: Turkey (2), Lebanon, Italy, Slovenia, France (the couple), England, Canada, Holland, Ireland, Scotland, America and Mexico. I'm learning just as much about the rest of the world as I am yoga. My steady companion is a beautiful Lebanese woman named Marie Helene. We roam around on my motor bike during breaks and discuss life in the Middle East. She has lived in Dubai and is in the process of moving to Kuwait. We get along like schmick and schmack and I'm very happy to have another close girlfriend. She's very funny, very worldly and totally unique. She's going to teach me belly dancing and arabic. I'm going to teach her what I know of yoga and perfect English. Hurray!

I saw my old high school acquaintance Freeman in Goa. He tried to surprise me at the airport b/c he missed his flight, but we missed each other. So, we caught up here. He's actually a man, now. Surprise! And India has been very good to him. He's cool, easy, warm and generous. He also lives a life of enterprise and freedom that he is passionate about. He loves India. He reminds me that you can do anything you set your mind to; including living in India and making your dream job yourself. I really respect him and appreciate that I can call him a friend now. I hope to see him again. He, like Marie Helene, is a virgo. I LOVE virgos!

Today is our first half day off of school. I'm going to help the guys make a path around the lake and we'll swim in the warm water of the ocean thereafter. The beach is mostly empty now as tourist season doesn't begin until Nov. 1. Goa is thus uncharacteristically quiet and clean. I can only imagine how things will change...I've been travelling over 9 months now as of 10/23 - I can hardly believe the transformation I've undergone. I've found myself and I love me. I miss my friends, too. I wonder every day how on earth I will return to my prior life. I'm not sure how. Everything seems and feels so different now. We'll see....